I know it seems like an eternity since I have been here to see you. I went to your resting place and am working on fixing it back up. I have bought you alot of stuff to make it look pretty, but it has been extrememly hot and I am waiting for it to cool just a little bit.
I had my last surgery last week. I start my new medication soon and hopefully that will be the end of the cancer. I am working hard at my job and the kids are quick to give me a hug when I think about you and start crying. It is amazing how much little children can understand.
I see so much of you in Zoey. She has your spunk. She would be driving you crazy. Neither one of you would back down and it would always be a stand-off. I wish you could see how much the kids have grown. You would be amazed at how different Jessica and Kayla are. It seems like only yesterday you were rocking them and singing them to sleep. I sometimes start to get onto Zoey and call her Holli by mistake. She is as rotten as you were at that age.
I lost lizzie. Her dad got out of jail and got custody of her and they wont let me see her. It broke my heart. It was like losing you all over again. I have had her since she was 5 weeks old and to have her taken away so sudden was devastating . Her second birthday is july 14 and I will be missing it. I think I will buy her a rose bush and plant it beside yours. Your white roses did not fair to well but your red ones bloom alot. Only right for red roses to bloom for my red headed angel.
I miss you holli waddles and think about you every day. I still expect you to come through the door. I don't know what will happen when I realize that it is real and that you won't be coming home.
Rags will be joining you soon. He is in bad health and mamaw and papaw are having a hard time letting him go. Please take care of him and send them some signs that hes ok when he gets there. He has completely quit eating and is losing wait fast. Papaw will be lost without him. Rags is his little buddy.
I will let you go for now waddles, but don't ever think that I have forgotten you. I know my visits are far and in between. Mr. Vince makes sure you know that you are in our hearts and I thank him with all my heart for that. He understands the pain and helps so much.
I love you my baby girl.